Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Up A Creek

Every time I think about it my heart begins to beat faster. Especially when it's gonna happen soon and the place is relatively close. Oooohh  I'm  very excited to go there again, even more thrilled to take you with me. What? What do you mean..... you don't want to go? COME ON, please come, I need you to help me get through this ugly empty nest rut. I'll try to make it fun, even without the use of a disco stick. Haha,  Don't make me put a lead rope around your neck!  Now picture this, there's this BIG old sod with vast expanding acreage. Perfectly placed are various soft hairlike grass spots dotted by large protruding shade trees. As your eyes glance over this shapely emerald body, you'll wonder if the jumps are real or are they fake? The urge to touch them will take over. Your body will get into the groove by allowing the sway of a Rocking Horse to take command. Over powering curiosity  will jostle your junk and before you, I and let's face it... we all know it, you'll be off! Running like a horse, exploring, meandering around, chewing on grass.  It's expected that first timers might find this all very intimidating. It sort of equals the experience, Alice went through when she dropped in on Wonderland.  As a matter of fact, memory of my first spectator show makes me want to ralph! You see, the hill made my legs tremble, they weakened more and more with each clamoring beat of pounding power that was heading our way. I locked up. Seized, as if I had stepped on a sword. Stood there frozen like a mouse about to be trampled! About to be pounced on by an overbearing pussy. Panic set in as my eyes met his. He sucked up one hell of a big breath.  Holy shit which way do I run? "Stay where you are!" the loud man standing with a horse between his legs, bellowed! Oh fuck and Good God I hope I don't cause this situation to turn into a complete disaster, bad thoughts were piercing my head. Immediately,  I turned off my "deer in the headlight eyes" and looked down. No way was I gonna give reason for that horse to spook, shy away and start acting like someone else's horse. Obviously this rider had been up a creek, like this before. He handled the situation, easy~calm with a  fly over,  like he had just jumped a dummy. For crying out loud........WATCH OUT!  Right? We could hear people bitching in the distance, then the stomping thunder became louder and louder. The sound of the hoof beat takes over your heart.  In no time, just like that.... they are upon you.  Clickety clack ~clop, Clickety clack~ clop, the earth will  move! It will be fast! They'll come pounding, breathing hard, wasting no time covering ground. Sweat rolls off, horse nostrils flare while the rider steers, focused on guiding them to their finial destination. They know when to push and how to drive. Timing is crucial....POP they're over it and whoosh they will blast by.

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I hold my breath and hang on tight, every time they gallop across the country. Mother of an EVENTER